My only escape.

I have only my friends.
I can only be open with them.
Not all open,
But at least I'm more "me" than being with my family.

For the first time in my life of 17 years,
I felt like home is not the place to be.
I don't feel like going back home.
I don't belong there.

I fake things.
I fake my emotions.
I said I didn't care,
But no,
That's not the case.

I said I didn't care,
Because I was hoping I could.
When I was laughing over the shit of my life,
I was hoping that what I felt was real.
Happy.

Nobody knew right?
Because I'm already so good at it.
Laughing over my fucked up life.
My fucked up family.

School,
I prefer that over my own damn house.
My house, cold and nothing else.

I love my friends,
Cause that's literally my only shelter.

Make a change.

I am so ashamed of myself
I really need to make some progress.
No, A LOT of progress.

I don't want to be looked down at.
I want to be a friend that deserves to be looked upon.
A friend that you can seek knowledge and help from.

I can't continue to be ignorant anymore.
I can't hate studying anymore.
I can't be a useless friend to people.
Or what thier mothers think, at least.

I can be polite, I am.
I can be fun, I am.
I can be generous, I am.
I can be smart, but I'm not.

People can be naturally intelligent,
Naturally beautiful,
But you can't be naturally smart or perfect.
We've got to work for it.

I'm studying.
Now.

Oh.My.Gooooooooooodness.

Please tell me it's true.
That you have come closer.
Closer to me.
I once hated you.
I once hoped that you will go further away from me.
Or disappear forever.

But that would never happen.
Either you're close, or you're far.
Be far, I once hoped you would.
You planted fear in my soul this year.
By being at that particular time,
You kill me more than ever.

But this time,
You came forward,
You walked towards my direction.
Unexpectedly,
I flung my arms wide open to appreciate you,
To appreciate your effort in approaching me.
I am thankful.

You came at the right time,
At the right moment.
It was a rumour but really,
I hope it's true.
Because,
How could you have the heart to break my heart now?
After all the joy you have brought me.
So please don't break my heart.

So please,
Come closer.
A little bit closer.
Let me see you clearly.
For I,
Couldn't accept if you were unreal,
And if you were,
I will die.

Look at me in the eyes,
Tell me that you can't have me faraway,
Even if you are here to torture,
Torture my mind and body,
Or in anyway you may,
I wouldn't blame you,
Because the distance between you and I,
Is all that I care.

So come closer,
Closer and closer.
And just a little closer...

SPM Trials!
Please tell me you are confirmed to be advanced to August !
I wanna watch Adam at Singapore in September!
Please...! T.T

Happy Daddy Day

20th of June 2010, Sunday.

Today is Dad's Day!
Went to Kiku Zakura with dad and bro at Times Square,
Then headed to Jusco Maluri for Secret Recipe :D
It was rare for the three of us to have dinner together.

Today,
Is also the end of Mid-Year's two-week holiday.
What have I done during these two weeks of holiday?
Nothing productive.
Except for the new Yu-Gi-Oh! Deck I made? :\
It is a strong one though :D

And I think I unintentionally offended someone,
One of the Glamberts..
And I'm really sorry :(
I was only upset and was acting on impulse,
I apologize!

I got my imported CDs too ! :))
Album,
SG and UK Edition,
Oh, and the Flaunt Mag :)
167.

School reopening tomorrow,
But now,
Going to enjoy my Dior Homme and my FYE UK Edition!
Bye~

If I Had You. Adam Lambert

This was what keeping me up until 2am yesterday!
The video is perfect as it is!
Adam, I love you! You rock ;)

If I Had You- Adam Lambert

I've decided to quit.

Temporarily quit, for the info.
I shall stop spending cold hard cash on cards already.
Until the end of 2011's Chinese New Year.
Probably will only spend a little bit after that.

I can't take all this burden anymore.
I'm gonna save for my watch,
My next dose of Dior Homme,
And some accessories to glam myself up.

For the first time at this level in my life,
I actually love fashion.
Adam made me realize my love for accessories and shiny things (Not the girlie type'a thing tho')
And I thank him for that. Salute ;)
Oh oh oh oh, and eyeliners! Mac, ftw :D

Currently,
I'm looking for a decent pair of white pants..
Jeans? idk.
I want white.
Golden shades and spiky hair.
Shiny shoes and glittery shirts.
Oooooooh, I like!

Working out these few days.
Especially with the seat ups.
Stomach cramp, nice.
I love the feeling of stiff muscles ! :D
I know, I'm being overly obsessed with the muscle thing again -.-

Adam has an official store online,
And I really wanna get that shirt :(
And for some reason,
I am starting to like leather accessories.
With diamonds and stubs and whatever's glammy.

So people,
You know what to get for my birthday eh? XD
Ok, just kidding. -.-

Dior Homme. Mine.

Remember the wishlist I made that day?
The Top 3 of my list?
Well, I owned two of them already :DD
Firsat was the card, Allure Of Darkness (Which was the cheapest in the list :\)
Then my Dior Homme! :D
The very parfum or eau de toilette that Adam uses himself! :)
It smells great, cause it's how Adam smells like.
Here's how it looks like.........................

The original pic

Picture I took
With my beloved "I Heart Adam Lambert More Than Ever" necklace. :))

It smells totally Adamazing!
I guess the only thing left on my wishlist is the watch I really want.
Work for it.